This is a question I often ask my clients. Who are you? It seems too obvious to ask, but the answer is fundamental to everything you want in life, relationships, sport, business.
Who are you? The answers vary hugely, from names, to describing by job, to labelling by relationship, to defining by biography. Or a huge smile and a nod.
Rewinding slightly. Everything you want? Grand claim. But yes. Here’s why…
The “you” most people consider themselves to be, the self most of us talk about, is this mind and body. That ages with the body. Is subject to the limitations of the body. That owns a localised consciousness. That lives in a world of “others”. A subject, experiencing objects. That is, therefore, separate.
This “you” is a seeker. Looking for ways to achieve or maintain success and happiness. Looking for ways to escape suffering and loss. Looking for ways to manage, fix and control experience. Thwarted by the fact that it doesn’t exist.
Yep. Doesn’t exist. Except as a thought, as experience. This “you” is not you. (This is why some teachers say “you” and “You”.) You are not this mind and body.
Here is one way of realising this, through self-inquiry:
Look back to your earliest experiences. The one who had those experiences was you, right? As a child, a teen, a young adult, every experience, experienced by you. A you who, beyond the limitations of the body, is the same you.
A friend in a new relationship laughs that he feels 17 again. My grandmother frequently announced she felt younger at 80 than she had at 60. Clients tell me they definitely don’t feel the 30/40/50 years their body claims. They are all right. The body has nominal age, but who you are is ageless.
So, who are you, if not a body and a mind? Maybe I don’t need to tell you. This is what you see for yourself, beyond the limitations of the body and mind, beyond the limitations of thought.
Start with realising who you are not, and the knowing of who you are will slowly come to the foreground.
Tell me, who are you?
With Love,
Sara
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